Lughnasadh

I should have written about this earlier, but I'm writing it now, so it's not a huge loss.

This Lughnasadh was very lovely! My sister, Noga, spent the night at my house. We sang together by the creek and went for a long walk on some trails. For dinner, we had foods that are associated with our first harvest, such as cornbread.
It had been a while since I'd last seen my younger sister, so spending time with her was so nice. It was also the first sabbat I'd actually celebrated with a pagan sister! As time goes on, I'm hoping that my sisters and I will be able to celebrate all the sabbats together.

How was your Lughnasadh, everyone?

Sabbats by Edain McCoy

So I work at a large-chain bookstore part-time and I'm able to check books out like at the library. I checked out Sabbats by Edain McCoy one day. I'm not a huge McCoy fan, but I liked what I saw as far as recipes and craft ideas in the book. My gods! I loved the book and had to buy it! It has so much good history and so many recipes and crafts in it. I checked quite a bit of the history online from different sources and most of it seems pretty accurate. There are rituals and guided meditations inside, as well, though I'm not much into those. I create my own rituals, instead....
Anyway, I really recommend this book if you're looking for good ideas for celebrating the sabbats each year.

Blessings to all.

Zahra

Summer Solstice

Greetings everyone! I see we have a few more followers to the blog - Welcome!
I know it's been a while and it probably will be a while after this post before I write another one, so I won't mention time again. It gets redundant and having no time to write is the way of this world these days....
My summer solstice was a bit of a hard one, as it was the last day I saw a dear friend of mine before he left to join the Navy. I wouldn't say that I celebrated, though I wouldn't say it was a bad day, either. I learned a lot and every day, be it hard or happy, changes me. Unfortunately, I didn't shield very well and so every emotion that others felt hit me hard. I, of course, was clueless until later when I realized what was going on, and was wondering why I was feeling such strong dread and depression that day. I knew it couldn't have been my own emotion and it wasn't.
I know from experience that the Sabbats open me up to different perceptions and things, so next time I'm sure I'll be aware enough to shield and know the difference between what is happening inside me and what is happening inside others.
So this Solstice really was a blessing, even if it didn't feel very good at the time.

How was your Summer Solstice, everyone?

As far as other things go, I've been super busy working two jobs, and that is the main reason I have not been able to write on my blogs. Soon I'm looking to get internet at home again, so I'll have more time after work to relax and write before bed (I usually have to go to the library to get online).

I hope all is well with all of you.
Lots of love and love you lots.

Beltane

Dear me, so much for not disappearing in the blog-world! So sorry....
So May 1st was Beltane, as I'm sure all of you know. Because it was also the birthday of one of my siblings, and because the grass is green (ahh, lovely), I wanted to have a special celebration.
I took my time with all that I did, and yet, I accomplished so much and felt so wonderful....
I went and spoke with one of my employers about my summer job-to-be. I went to the gas station for a few more things for the celebration. I crocheted (Oh yes, and I learned to crochet the week before from a book) some ribbon together in a circle and took it to the park. Then I stuck grasses and dandelions and twigs in it to make a small door wreath. I also found a lovely blackbird's feather and a pinecone, which I attached. I baked a lemon cake with lemon cream cheese frosting. I started a bonfire in our firepit. I did the dishes, cleaned the bathroom and my bedroom, all the while playing with the puppy.
Ohh, it was such a beautiful day! So peaceful! It was a little chilly outside, but it didn't affect me any.
My brother got home from work and we had hotdogs over the fire, salad, chips and salsa, cake. We played with the puppy more.
I went to bed peaceful. Thank the gods and goddesses for the most perfect Beltane I've ever experienced. Thank the faeries and wandering spirits for their most sweet attitude toward me and mine.

I hope you all had a lovely Beltane, as well. Hugs to the world!

Long Time....

I know, I know! I haven't written for a long time, but (here come the lame excuses) I haven't had internet so I have to go to the library to get online and I keep forgetting and ... stuff....
Hush, I'm back. Mostly.
In witchy news, one of my sisters has decided to become a witch! After over a year of debating, she finally (happily, I might add) became a Christian witch. Her name, Neviah, is Hebrew for 'Prophetess'. That should tell you quite a bit about her. Mayhap I can get her to write here, as well!
I finally was able to go on a Sunday hike with Witch-N-Bitch last weekend, which was very lovely. I was so determined to go to class the following Tuesday, but forgot until 10pm when it was over. Buggrit! Next time, I hope!
That is about all that is new in my witchy world right now. What about all of you?

Marriage

Kahlil Gibran (I’ll probably post something of Gibran’s with each opinion. It just … fits.):

“THEN Almitra spoke again and said, And what of Marriage, master?
And he answered saying:
You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days.
Ay, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.”

Basically, I think that marriage (with signed legal documents and everything) is pure silliness. I don’t see any reason why you shouldn’t celebrate your love for one another; don't get me wrong. If I was with someone, I would probably have a ‘wedding’ or celebration for each season that we were together. Autumn would have changing leaves and lots of autumn colours and pumpkin pies and such, Winter would have sleigh rides and white snowy outfits, etc.
But making it a bound contract to stay with someone makes no sense to me. Love is constant, but compatibility never could be. You may love someone your entire life, yet be unable to handle living with them or being together constantly. It is the same with relationships. You can easily love someone, be with someone, but you can’t own them. You can’t make them be with you and with no one else. That is just ridiculous.
If you want to know more about how I feel with relationships and such, read Being In Love by Osho. That is all.

Opinions on Love

Kahlil Gibran, “THEN said Almitra, Speak to us of Love.
And he raised his head and looked upon the people, and there fell a stillness upon them. And with a great voice he said:
When love beckons to you, follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep.
And when his wings enfold you yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.
And when he speaks to you, believe in him,
Though his voice may shatter your dreams as the north wind lays waste the garden

For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.
Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,
So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.

Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself.
He threshes you to make you naked.
He sifts you to free you from your husks.
He grinds you to whiteness.
He kneads you until you are pliant;
And then he assigns you to his sacred fire, that you may become sacred bread for God’s sacred feast.

All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart, and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life’s heart.

But if in your fear you would seek only love’s peace and love’s pleasure,
Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love’s threshing-floor,
Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.

Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.
Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;
For love is sufficient unto love.

When you love you should not say, “God is in my heart,” but rather, “I am in the heart of God.”
And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.

Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself.
But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires:
To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving;
To rest at the noon hour and meditate love’s ecstasy;
To return home at eventide with gratitude;
And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.”

Our family values, “Love yourself so you can love others. Love everything. Love everyone. Love everything in everyone. Love Love, Love Hate.”

People ask, What is Love? And it can’t be defined. It is inside you, it is not outside you. Love isn’t in actions or words, Love is only within you. You feel it at certain times, you don’t at others. There is nothing you can say or do to change that. Love is Love.

Opinions From 17 Years of Living In This Body

These are my opinions as of 01/07/2010, my 18th birthday. I'll be posting my opinions on different topics of life throughout the year. Note that I don't mind your disagreement, though you will not convince me of anything otherwise. This means that any comments that try to get me to 'understand the truth' will be deleted. It would be a waste of your time to type it all out. These are my opinions; you are not required in my book to share them.
You may or may not wish to read this; you may or may not hate me after.
That is your decision. Choose wisely. Or not; that is also your decision.
I will go by topic just so I don’t type in circles. If you read this and want me to type out my opinions of you, I will. It could be painful for you, but maybe it would help you face things. Maybe it would show you how wrong I am.

A good topic to start with is PARENTING AND CHILDREN, as I am legally moving away from this….

Fucking a young woman and getting her pregnant with your hormones does not give you the right to demand respect from anyone. Your actions are not respectable nor are they respectful.
If you can be impatient at all at any time, you should not be a parent. It would end in much pain for everyone.
If you are a teacher or wish to be a teacher, you should not be a parent.
Teachers think they are teachers, yet they know not and only have a large ego. ‘Life Experience and Wisdom’ is bullshit, as people go through many lives. An infant could have more life experience than you have and you wouldn’t know it unless you look in their eyes and see they are much wiser than you could hope to be at this time.
Do not raise your child up in religion; it may not be the truth. Let them find the truth and their own path in their own time.

Kahlil Gibran, “AND a woman who held a babe against her bosom said, Speak to us of Children.
And he said:
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows form which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.”

For those who were raised as children, your parents are but children themselves. They were ‘raised and brought up right’ and they are stuck. They deserve pity and love. Be bitter if you must, but when you are done, look at them in a new light and see just how terrified they are in life, see how much they are children trying to handle responsibilities of life.
For those who are raising their children, look at your children in a new light, as well. See how much your actions and reactions are affecting them, either in a positive or negative way. A lot of parents who try their best ruin their children’s lives. And a lot of parents trying to ruin their children’s lives turn out wonderful people. Just be aware.

Going Insane

Last Sunday, I was at Witch-N-Bitch in town and I was explaining why I wanted to become insane on my birthday. I want to drop all of society and every silly, frivolous inhibition I have. I figure that the day I turn 18 will be a very nice day to finally do that because I'll be dropping everything from my parents and childhood.
Uncle Ac brought to the conversation a point that is marvelous and makes me even more excited to go insane: If I have lost all of the world's rules of how things supposedly are, I can create much easier, therefore adding more power to my spells. I'm kind of using my own words here, but I think I am transposing what he spoke pretty much correctly (if it's all screwed up, you're welcome to correct me, Ac).
Imagine. If I truly become the insane I wish to be, a table will no longer be real. A piece of popcorn is no longer real. This means that I can say, "Okay, so THIS is how I want things to be. This is now how things ARE." I can create my own universe.

Happy Thanksgiving to All!

Today, I am thankful for my mom's puppy, Stick, my mom and my brother. I am thankful for all of my brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, cousins, grandparents and friends. I'm even thankful for Dad. I am thankful to John, the turkey we will eat. I am thankful to the Mother Earth for providing all this wonderful ... FOOOOOD!!!!! I am thankful to Father Sun for helping us all grow and to Sister Moon for pushing and pulling us through our comfort zones and out. I am thankful to water for keeping us from shriveling up into little balls of skin. I am thankful to earth for giving us the clay of our bodies. I am thankful to air for letting us breathe, this miracle that keeps us alive. I am thankful to fire for keeping us warm and safe. I am thankful to the pilgrims for killing Sue on that first thanksgiving and starting the wonderful tradition of eating turkey one day a year. I am thankful to pumpkins and eggnog. And tea. Always tea.

What are you thankful for?
I'm thankful for you.

Another Night of Terror/So Many Questions.

So, Z had an interesing night the other night. Well, last night I had one of my own.

It started with a normal asthma attack, I get them a lot. The coughing, the wheezing, the turning my room inside out looking for my inhaler. I finally found it, and used it. ... Nothing, I used it again... Still nothing. The medicine was coming out but it wasn't stopping my asthma. I don't know how many more times I used it, not too many like a druggie, but I just wasn't counting. I was crying. I was talking to Z already and we were trying to figure out what I could do. I think she was actually looking up things on the internet that I could do to make it better while we talked, but I'm not sure. I love her though. She was able to keep me fairly calm.

Finally, it got to the point where I had to tell my parents we were going to the hospital because I couldn't breathe. I kept praying to the Goddess and holding onto my teddy bear for dear life. The whole ride there I was fighting tears. But the most interesting thing happens when I get there.

I was sitting there, while the actually-kind nurse took my information down, and I was staring down the empty, dimly-lit halls. I felt death lingering, breathing down my neck. How the shadows were sitting, they were cloaking death itself. I could see death in them, just past them, hiding and waiting. I almost burst out in tears. I was terrified. I could feel death's fingers trailing along my skin, I could see shackles hanging, waiting for me in my mind's eye. The Angel of Death brings with it a thick shroud and last night I was immersed. It was odd, usually death in my mind is a peaceful, beautiful, almost kind thing. Where you can pass along to a happier place and rest. But last night it was something of evil. It was like the mask had come off and instead of looking at a kind old lady I could see the succubus with her gray, tight skin and pointed teeth, with black, endless eyes and long, stringy black hair. She was beautiful in a demonic way.

I was even closer to bursting into tears at this point. It was all so close, coming for me, and I couldn't breathe. I prayed to the God to keep death away, to protect me from that demon I never want to see again. Then I prayed to the Goddess to comfort me, to keep me strong and help me breathe. Then I felt them, around me. The Goddess with her arms around me, holding me like a true mother. The God standing before me, daring death to come near me, to touch me again, ready to release his wrath. I could see them. For the first time in my life I actually saw them. Was I really that close to dying? I suppose so. I was calm again, though. I felt safe even though I still couldn't breathe.

I looked around, absently answering the nurse's questions, and I saw another person. I knew he'd come with the God and Goddess. And... in a strange way he was overwhelmingly familiar. I looked at him, directly in his eyes, and I felt the rest of the word disappear. Somehow, I was still answering the nurse's questions, going through the movements. I somehow loved him instantly. I knew he was the one who always came and wrapped his arms around me when I was scared or sad or confused, even though I could never see him, never feel his tight embrace, I knew he was always there and here I was staring into his beautiful eyes. He smiled, a beautiful smile I will never forget, and the nurse called my attention back to her.

We walked to the room I'd be cured in and the nurse went through all the steps with my rag-doll of a body. I was tired. I wanted to sleep and dream of the nameless love. His handsome face. His sparkling eyes and flawless smile and the comfort he brought with him. He was gone though, so was the God and Goddess. I was alone again but I didn't feel death biting at my heels anymore. I was treated completely, made better, talked with the doctor and told I needed steroids.

I fell asleep dreaming of his face and his smile and the cloud of comfort that surrounded him. I fell asleep wondering who he was. And I woke up this morning sad to have to have left him.

I'm sorry it was so long! My heart to you all!
Lots of Love and Love you Lots!
Blessed Be
-Leyla.

Night of Terror

Okay, so I think I mentioned before how I did a real nice Samhain ritual and how a few days before then, I kept getting little premonitions. Well, truth be told, when those started, right before Samhain, something had changed. I keep seeing things. Out of the corner of my eye. Usually just startling me a tad, they mostly seem benevolent. No biggy, yes? Right. So tonight, Mom and I walked together into downtown, spent some time at the all-night cafe, enjoyed ourselves. Near the end, before we left to walk home (30 min. walk), I got real sleepy and just kind of zoned out. It was about 2:15am or so when we left. All was well as we passed the town clock and I 'pentacled' myself, still fine when we passed Memorial Park. But as we started walking right past that, I saw something. Not a big deal, yet. I'm freaking out as I type this. So we continued. We walked through the parking lot of the Bad Building (a building housing a brotherhood ... it has a demonic feel to the place), crossed The Bridge (not certified safe), started walking the trail. Once we got past the gated boundary of the building's property, I kissed one of my guardian trees as thanks for safety and, at this point, we were enjoying ourselves and chatting. We crossed the street to the next trail and I was showing her where certain things happened in this one dream I had had a while back.

In the dream, Mama and I were walking the trail at night. Our friend, Clara Luna (doggie), was walking with us and we told her to go back because it wasn't safe. Like ... spiritually unsound. She finally ran back to town. We continued and I don't really remember what happened next. Nothing bad, but there was a bad, forboding feeling to it.

So we continue walking ... I keep seeing shadows (you may say, duh[!] it's night[!]), but they move. And Things are popping up and I am FREAKING OUT. We pass this one part of the trail where there's a sewer thing above the ground, raised by this cement pouring. I see Mama and I's shadows pass on it and I grab her arm, because at this point, I almost can't take the fright. By the way, the other shadows aren't Mom's and they aren't mine. I tell her kind of what is going on. It is a BAD feeling. We keep walking and I just want to burst out crying and run as fast as possible outta here. But I keep walking with Mom and trying to shield as best I can. We cross under the bridge for the highway and I am still seeing tons of shadows. As we continue walking, Mom informs me that her entire body, but especially the backs of her legs are getting chills.
We are at the Faerie Park and the faerie mound is in sight. I feel like breaking out in a run. But I walk at a steady pace, instead. Right as we reach a split in the sidewalk and stay on our path, the Thing behind us, following us, stops. I can feel it. It kind of fades as we walk farther away from it. But then a ... almost a probe is sent out from it. I can tell that what is following us now isn't IT, but it is still a conscious watching. I tell Mom to hold on as we reach the faerie mound. I walk up onto it, into the circle of trees of the grove and lean against one tree. I'm just shaking like a leaf, tearing up. But peace pervades right away and I walk between a 'doorway' of trees and the faerie 'shield' stays with me. I can still feel the Thing back there, but I feel safe and confident now.
Mom tells me she felt it, too. We continue and as we cross the next street, the Thing stays behind. I feel safe now. We go home.
Boy, oh boy, was that intense!

So now, I'm sitting here, typing this. I can feel ... the back of my neck is cold. I'm facing away from a window in our laundry room. Th- Okay, nevermind. There ... dammit! Okay, well, there WAS a probe watching me, but I was okay. Then as I went to type that, it went away and when I went to type THAT, it came back. So indecisive, eh? Ha.

So anyhow, I was trying to figure out what could be going on. Two things. There is Something right on that second trail that I can feel all the way here. I felt it last night, but not as strong. Tonight, I'm sure it's stronger because we went into its Territory. Speaking of Territory, it got me to thinking. I just explained to the 'probe' that I realise now, that the trail there is It's Territory at night. Between dawn and dusk. I didn't know before. East of the Mound/Grove ... that's my Territory. West is Its. I will no longer go west of the edge of the grove, unless I'm on the busy road. I'll stay out of the Territory at night. And the Thing is allowed to visit my Territory, but tonight it must go or I will be pissed. Well, it went. We have an understanding now.

All is well.
Blessings and Peace.
I apologize to the Thing.

(Note: Sorry it's a bit long. And I don't want to re-read it tonight for edits, so I'll do that later. If there's a typo or something, I'll fix it soon.)

New Book

I got a new book from the library and when I read the cover and looked at the author's picture, I didn't think I'd like it. But I had placed it on hold, unseen (bad habit of mine), so I checked it out.
The book is called Garden Witch's Herbal by Ellen Dugan.
When I got home, I looked through it and read some things. The more I read, the more I liked. I guess it is true that you can't read a book by its cover.
Although the publisher is Llewellyn (ew), and the author spells magic with a 'k', her writing is marvelous. She has practiced magic for more than 25 years, as well as having received her Master Gardener status through the University of Missouri. So she really seems to know what she is talking about. There is a lot of information in the book and the drawings are beautiful.
Definitely a book I want to own.

Something To Do With Water....

I mentioned in Samhain Part III that Ac and Carmin gifted us with some essential oil - Hecate Trivia. I didn't know what it was used for, so I asked Carmin on Facebook.

Answer:
Divination, ritual, appeals specifically to Hecate for guidance, dream and astral work.

Okay, that works. I was excited to use it. Last night was Occult Science class at the bookstore in town and we were talking about the oil. Mom told us all that she rubbed some on her hands because it smelled good and a lot of weird stuff happened to her all day.
We got home and I was really tired, in a funky state of mind. When I went to bed, I decided not to try using the oil, just yet. But a few minutes later, I changed my mind and put a couple drops on my pillow; went to sleep. I had really weird dreams, although that's not weird at all. I always get those. Early in the morning, I woke up to either Sam or Mom in the kitchen. I thought, "There's something to do with water. Water." I chewed on that word as whoever was in the kitchen turned on the faucet. I went back to sleep, content with the little premonition, had more weird dreams and that was that. For now. I'm going to expirement with this oil. This is fun!

The Heart Of Life - John Mayer

This is an absolutely beautiful song. I find it a great state of mind to start the new year with. Forgive this post for not being very long, I'm falling asleep on my keyboard, but I wanted to share.

Much love to everyone,
Blessed Be,
-Leyla.

Samhain Part III

So it was about 6:30pm. Lovely Carmin was working until 8pm, so I thought I’d bring her some orange-cinnamon rolls, oatmeal chocolate-chip cookies, candy, things like that. But first, I’d call, in case she wasn’t in the mood for visiting. I could just imagine working and someone walks a mile or so to visit me and so I can’t just turn them away, but I do NOT want to be social. So I called and she said that she, Uncle Ac and one of their friends was going to come over after Ac got off work at 9pm. Of course I was all excited! My first Samhain Stop-By visitors! (I had to finish singing along to that song. I can’t sing and type at the same time. Haha … that would be an INTERESTING blogpost to upload. It would make no sense.) Sam and Mama and I hung out and joked around and then Mama got ready for work and left at about 8:20pm. She works the night shift. You probably don’t need to know all these little details….

I started a fresh pot of coffee and put a new pan of orange-cinnamon rolls in the oven. Sam started a fire in our firepit outside and we enjoyed the warmth.



Ac, Carmin and their friend Dan arrived and we exchanged hugs. Ac tried to pop my back when he hugged me, but I had been relaxed all day, as well as having done tai chi in the morning, so it didn’t work real well, haha.
Ac and Carmin presented us with beautiful gifts from their shop: An orange skull candle, 4 pink candles, incense and Hecate Trivia oil. The aroma when I open the box is one of the best things in the multiverse!

So we gave Ac, Carmin and Dan a tour of our house. Ac ‘fixed’ my sewing machine, meaning that I had the bobbin on backward. Whoops! In our hallway/art gallery, Carmin was looking at the pictures and I told her the story of the fly and the spider. You see, we have this piece of art that Sammy and I did together (oil pastel) of a jumping spider leaping at a fly. We messed up on one spot and trying to fix it made it worse. But we decided that the fly has a force-field and the spider doesn’t know about it. But he’ll find out about it, oh yes he will, when he runs into it! Anyway, I learned from Carmin which eraser will be able to fix mistakes like that. We agreed, though, that the fly’s force-field was too cool to fix.

Then we sat around the fire, enjoying roasted marshmallows and hotdogs, cinnamon rolls, coffee and family. We had some wonderful conversations and some really nice silences. Our dog, Stick, really enjoyed the company, of course.




He wasn’t as hyper as he usually is, because it was past his bedtime.

Our friends left at about 1am so they could get sleep for the next day and Sammy and I went inside. We enjoyed each other’s presence for a while and conversed, although in a very short time, I couldn’t keep track of my thoughts. I was exhausted after 33 hours awake and only one hour of sleep after the first 7 hours. So we parted for sleep, which was very deep for me that night. …Morning. Yes, morning.

Blessed Be
Thanks for the photos, Sam

Samhain Part II

This Samhain has been just as interesting as last, in a different sort of way. Let me explain. I’m going to be turning 18 in a couple months, so this was a big Samhain to celebrate for me. I decided that I was going to celebrate it with a ritual, my first Samhain ritual. I know, I know … I’ve been studying and practicing (sorta) for about 11 years, but still. I usually just live my life as lovely as I can, but I decided that THIS year, I oughtta do a ritual. A real one.

So I made sure I was up before midnight. I set up with a blanket on the floor over a heater (comforts, ya know), a pentacle drawn with blue pencil underneath that. I had some good stories to read, a sort of lullaby chant to sing, my wand, Mama’s tarot cards, a full purse, a bookmark….
And last, but not least, I had my steaming cup of mint hot cocoa. I stood and began calling the directions … and had to pee. I had 3 minutes before midnight, but I made it! So I stood and began calling the directions. I faced West with my wand and said, “I call upon the North…. Wait.” Lol, as usual, I said the wrong thing. I usually do that sort of thing. After I finished calling the correct directions and everything else, I sat down on the heater so my butt would warm up. I read a bit from The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran, a few stories from books ‘Sun Lore’ and ‘Moon Lore’, I stated what I wanted to happen in the next year. I did a wonderful tarot reading, and then Stick came into my circle and climbed into my lap for a story (Mary Margaret’s Tree). He loved it and he kept trying to lick my chin and he couldn‘t keep his back leg or his tail still.
Then I opened the circle and took my time (hours) getting ready for the Samhain Stop-By.

The house was clean-er (the dash is to put emphasis on the ‘er‘), all was ready.

I kept checking my emails, facebook, twitter, myspace, in case anyone had any questions or anything. And it was amazing how depressed people were, especially compared to myself. Because I see Samhain as representing new beginnings, it seemed to me that the majority of the people who posted a new status were going to have a terrible year.

Now, most of the things that happened to these people were circumstantial, however there is always an abundance of ways to be un-bothered about it.
Here is an example. One of my sisters, Leyla (as you can see from her post below this one), was in parental house arrest. That is just bullshit. Because she felt anger, a human emotion. Because she no longer wants to be under someone else’s control. I know that she is mature enough to make decisions for herself, but she is forced to be under her parents’ control. So she felt anger and mentioned that she no longer wants to live in that house. Now she is grounded. Boy, is that a good way to make her want to live there! Clever people.
Although she was bothered about it, she still didn’t spend the day sulking and being muddy. She was active and found ways to deal with it and she had a pretty good Samhain, anyway.
Then there are those people who just start sinking in the quicksand of despair. But, continuing with the metaphor of quicksand, if they would only wait and be patient, the (let’s add another metaphor, shall we?) wheel of life will turn again. The sun will come out and dry the mud and you can just brush it off of yourself. Patience and it will all be alright.

Speaking of patience, this was a long post. Thank you for having the patience to wait for Part II and actually read it when it appeared. Part III in a very short while.

I love you.

Heyya All! Happy Late Samhain!

Hello Everyone!

I am the new contributor, Leyla Fajr, and, as Z so eloquently put, I'm a new witch still figuring everything out. Sorry I haven't posted any sooner, I've been lazy and have a lot of homework.

Anyways, as you all should know, yesterday was Samhain. I didn't get a chance to really do anything, as I was and still am under (parental) house arrest, however it was still an amazing day. I've learned so much for this new year, and so many new beginnings have come to my attention, without even realizing that they were coming with Samhain, our new year and it's new beginnings. At first it was frustrating and confusing, but then I just let the Goddess carry me and now it's easy. I hope Samhain was wonderful, happy, and eye-opening for everyone! Blessed Be Everyone!

Much love.
-Leyla

Samhain Part I

Happy New Year and Merry Samhain, brothers and sisters!

WOW! This year’s Samhain was very fascinating. Indeed.

But first, I’m going to reminisce. I’ve had lots of wonderful Halloweens throughout my childhood.

In fact, when I was 6, I started wanting to be a real witch that Halloween. My brother, cousin Bri and I were all ‘witches’ in play. We each had a music recorder and they were our wands. But then Dad made us go home.
Anywho, I’ve been dressed up as many things in the past. Clowns, Witches, Vampires, even Power Rangers! Of course, as a child, I was happiest after Trick-or-Treating, when I was out of the cold, eating candy.
One year (I think I was 4 and Sam was 6), we were living with our Grandma and we grew our own pumpkins in her garden. It was really wonderful.

Now the story of last year. I dressed up early in the morning, but I ended up looking like a hooker.

So I changed into a vampire.

I went out Trick-or-Treating, because Mama and our friend, Jeff, wanted candy. It was real quiet and almost no one was out for some reason. I walked up a few streets and turned around to go on the other side. I came to this duplex, knocked on one of the doors … waited.

The door opens and there’s this lady who is swaying slightly. She gasps and puts her hands to her mouth. “Oh my god, I can’t believe it! Are you serious?”
I kind of look at her like … uh … what?
“Are you REALLY Trick-or-Treating? Seriously? Are you sure?”
I’m nodding and thinking I might want to make a run for it.
“Here, I made some chocolate cupcakes for all the little Trick-or-Treaters! Oh wow, our first Trick-or-Treater, I can’t believe it. Look, honey!” She’s talking to a man in his PJ’s who is sitting on their couch, watching TV. He has a beer in his hand and he’s talking to someone on a cell phone. He says into the phone, “Yeah, we just got our first Trick-or-Treater. She’s all excited about it.”
Then the lady brings a tray of cupcakes to me. Gives me one. Insists I take another. “I just want to give her the whole lot of them! I just want to throw them at her!” She stares at me in awe for a few seconds. “I love you! I just want to give you all the cupcakes!”
Finally her husband gets her to shut the door and I leave.

I threw the cupcakes away; No telling what was in them.

Look What I Can Do!

I can write a post here, promoting my new post on my other blog!
Yes, this blogpost is only to say that Miscellaneous Insanities has a new blogpost.
Okay, well ... almost. I also wanted to say that it is absolutely GORGEOUS outside. Bitter cold, but it is beautiful in the snowy mountains! Also, nestled in these very mountains, there are so many fairy parks and places with lots of wonderful activity.

Much Love